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Coaching Corner: Real Self Care

Coaching Corner: Real Self Care

Nov 9, 2023

By Marilou Butcher-Roth, Master Coach

Recently, I finished a book entitled “Real Self Care” by Dr.  Pooja Lakshmin. This book presented some new ideas on how I (and hopefully you) view the concept of self-care.  In the book, the author talks about the typical societal view of self-care, i.e. yoga classes, nail appointments, etc.

She goes into detail referring to these activities as “faux self-care,” explaining that when you have someone who is already inundated with a plethora of to-do's, these alleged self-care items can, in fact, become just something else we feel we need to do. She explains that real self-care involves clear boundary setting with no guilt. Instead, it requires self-compassion and identifying and living from your values.  Sounds easy enough until I began to explore this idea further.  I consider myself to be excellent at boundary setting, yet where I clearly need some work is around the guilt piece, finding myself justifying my decisions, sometimes inwardly and sometimes to the person I just set a boundary with.

This week, tune into those items that you have deemed to be self-care and check in with yourself to see how clear your own boundaries are.  Are you, like me, finding yourself justifying your decisions?  What about your self-talk? Are you being compassionate? Releasing feelings of guilt when they are attached to your own needs is a challenge for many, but necessary. For guidance, contemplate how you’d feel not taking care of yourself—would that serve anyone properly? (Hint: the answer is no…) 

This is a big one, so be gentle!

Marilou Butcher Roth

Marilou Butcher Roth

Marilou Butcher Roth is the owner of The MBR Group, a coaching and training company working primarily with REALTORS who have a desire to work and live from a more inspired place. She is also the Broker/Owner of Group REALTORS in Cincinnati.

Marilou is a member of the Ohio REALTORS Board of Directors and past chairman of the organization’s Communications Committee.

Contact Marilou at  to see if coaching is right for you.

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