Coaching Corner: The Power of NO!
by Marilou Butcher Roth, Master Coach
Recently, several of my clients have expressed their frustration around situations where they agreed to do something they truly didn’t want to do. We have all been there! Saying ‘no’ can be difficult and yet, not saying ‘no’ can create angst within us.
One of downfalls I have seen with people in attempting to voice their ‘no,’ is over justifying. People can give way too much information, somehow thinking that the more justification they give, the better their ‘no’ will be received. Wrong! Truly, less is better. Authenticity is better. Simple is better.
When asked to participate in an activity that you do not want to, I feel it is important to appreciate the person for asking you. After that, you might say that right now that particular activity will not work for you. Done! But, you say, what if they keep asking? And….they tell you how wonderful it would be to have you there. Oh boy! Take a breath, and stay with your original answer, perhaps appreciating them again.
Learning how to say ‘no’ requires patience and practice, more for some than others. Be kind to yourself and realize you get to choose how you will spend your time. You get to choose with whom you will spend your time.
I have a “NO” button, similar to the Staples “Easy” button, where there are six different ways of saying ‘no,’ ending with “For the last time, NO!”. This may be a fun way to remind you to that it’s okay to say ‘no.’ Actually, it is very powerful when you can claim your individual ‘no.’
Give it a try! And please don’t say ‘no’ to that!!!
Marilou Butcher Roth
Marilou Butcher Roth is the owner of The MBR Group, a coaching and training company working primarily with REALTORS who have a desire to work and live from a more inspired place. She is also the Broker/Owner of Group REALTORS in Cincinnati.
Marilou is a member of the Ohio REALTORS Board of Directors and past chairman of the organization’s Communications Committee.
