Coaching Corner: No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed
By Master Coach Marilou Butcher Roth
Any of you who have been in the honored position to sing to small ones may know this catchy counting tune: Five little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head, mama called the doctor and the doctor said -- NO MORE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED!" It counts down from there until there are no more monkeys on the bed -- fun over!
Yes, I suppose I have strange thoughts sometimes, but for whatever reason, this song was rolling around in my head this morning. It has always been one of my personal favorites, using my fun, stern doctor voice as I firmly instruct the mama not to let her little monkeys jump on the bed.
Then my thoughts went further, as I found myself taking the song to another level. How do we, as adults, bump our heads in the midst of fun or success? In my coaching world, this is known as an 'upper limit'. We have all done it to varying degrees—finding ourselves enjoying something immensely and then... we bump our heads (aka hitting an imaginary ceiling). Does this sound or feel at all familiar? Some use the term " self-sabotage.
Here's what happens. If we are carrying around old messages about how much fun, joy, love, or success we can handle, we will UNCONSCIOUSLY find a way to slow ourselves down. I have seen this with relationships and with business. We obviously do not do this on purpose. It seems counterintuitive to think that we stop ourselves from enjoying more of what we like. And yet, it can happen.
Have you ever found yourself in a great space with a mate, imagining that things are going sooooo well? And then, before you even know what has happened, you find something (usually small) that they have done that totally irritates you, and you MUST have a conversation about this alleged offense?
There are countless examples of upper limiting. The key here is to notice when you find yourself bumping your head and get curious about it, without judging the event. The more you can understand about your own patterns, the less your mama will need to call the doctor, and you can continue to jump on the bed as much as you like!
