Coaching Corner: Celebrating mothers!
By Marilou Butcher Roth
Here is where it gets interesting to me. When I had my children, I do not recall any book with guidelines ensuring the best possible parenting skills. Maybe I missed this in all the excitement but I definitely felt very much on my own to figure this out, with the input of friends and family, of course! So here I was, 23 years old with not one but two babies, both looking to me for their very survival on every level. I rose to the occasion with an open heart, amazing intentions and very little sleep! Within two years, two more babies came my way and I remember clearly having a moment when reality hit me -- I had four babies in diapers! They are my responsibility! Their lives are literally in my hands! I met this awareness with both excitement and trepidation, wanting the very best for these beautiful boys, and feeling empowered to create an amazing life for them.
And 37 years later, I love the men my sons have become and I now have the realization that we, as mothers, can only love our children the best we can. We cannot create ease where they are choosing hardship, we cannot make important decisions for them that are contrary to their strongest desires. Bottom line -- we are not in charge! I raised four sons and each one has had their individual issues present themselves, showing up differently for each. They are similar and yet quite different. I was, and am, the same mother to each of them and yet their development reached far beyond the similarities that they possess.
In looping this in a bigger way, having this realization allows me to also arrive at that same place with my own mother. I know without doubt she loves me without question and also that she upon my birth wanted exactly the same things for me that I desired for my sons. How do we create expectations of our mothers, looking to them for whatever it is we think we need and then blaming them when we have not achieved this or that? As adults, we can be free of these thoughts if we acknowledge that we are in charge of ourselves and that our mothers did the very best they could. Situations that may have appeared less than perfect might have propelled us to greater desires!
The more we can acknowledge the perfection in our lives, the more fulfilling our lives become. And without our mothers, we would not be here! So celebrate life, what you have and how you bring your very best self into this world and in doing so, your mother's work is done!
Happy Mother's Day!
Marilou Butcher Roth
Marilou Butcher Roth is the owner of The MBR Group, a coaching and training company working primarily with REALTORS who have a desire to work and live from a more inspired place. She is also the Broker/Owner of Group REALTORS in Cincinnati.
Marilou is a member of the Ohio REALTORS Board of Directors and past chairman of the organization’s Communications Committee.
